Steveats: Sbarro, my filthy guilty pleasure pizza

Debuting a new, semi-regular feature! I tryout questionable food items so that you don’t have to in… Steveats. (Note: Title developed in about 10 seconds of brainstorming.)

A couple weeks back, my ole journalism buddy and American Idol fan Rueb suggested that I review the various acceptable pizzas now at gas stations and convenience stores. While that’s definitely still in the cards, I recently had a chance to indulge in my true guilty pleasure pizza – Sbarro.

Now, my brain realizes that Sbarro is all sorts of disgusting. Theoretically, it is New York-style pizza, but Sbarro is to pizza as Velveeta is to cheese – technically the same, but only faintly familiar.

If you’ve never been to a Sbarro at a mall or truck stop, pizzas are seemingly baked at a Question Mark time and left out under a heat lamp, to be sold slice by slice, until there is no more. Traditionally, they offer on-demand cheese, pepperoni, a “stuffed” slice and a fourth random option, like broccoli or sausage.

I’ve written briefly before about my like of Sbarro’s. For this post today, I went with the “stuffed” pizza, which is essentially a kind pizza casserole. In the middle of two pieces of dough is some sausage, pepperoni and bacon, with cheese. It basically makes your heart want to explode from cholesterol, but, it’s also somewhat delicious. Plus, I’m positive it was all balanced out by the cucumber and tomato salad I had.

Other random things about Sbarro – the Wikipedia page is oddly cheerful. It is also the favorite New York pizza spot of Michael Scott, and Jack Donaghy once dated Pizzarina “Zarina” Sbarro. And hey, they also managed to file for bankruptcy twice in three years! But, they seem to be out of it…  for now.

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Parks still good, Office still uneven

While I favored Community among Thursday's shows this week, Parks and Recreation was still pretty entertaining. Leslie tried to stop a rich socialite and former Miss Pawnee - one of the judges from the beauty contest in an earlier episode - from demolishing several historical aspects of a local mansion. Leslie going nuts about an environmental issue isn't exactly new, exciting ground for the show, but it didn't suck.

The better plot of the show centered on April and Ron's relationship. She had mistakenly scheduled him for 90+ meetings on March 31 because she thought March only had 30 days, not 31. As a result, dozens of people showed up, expecting a meeting with Ron. Because of this, Ron ordered April, Andy and Ann to pretend to be important Parks and Recreation employees to deal with all of the people.

Ron also yelled at April at one point, which later caused her to quit. This results in the episode's best scenes and sight gags, as Ron has to venture to April's parents' house to talk her into working in the department again. Of course, April's parents are completely normal and friendly, which has caused April and her sister Natalie to rebel by being apathetic. These three or four minutes really elevate an otherwise average episode.

Grade: B

So much for The Office recovering some of its mojo. A week after a pretty decent episode that didn't suck, we go right back to the awkward, uncomfortable episode of the early and mid-season. NBC already screwed up Heroes, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised that they managed to do the same to The Office. (Note to self: Find some way to protect Parks and Recreation and Community.

The episode was mostly ridiculous and uncomfortable (some might say ridiculously uncomfortable) because of Michael's flirting with a bartender he met a couple of episodes ago. While she is undoubtedly foxy, which is nice, she already seems weird and kind of like Jan. I suppose someone on the show has to date regularly, but for an unsuccessful clod, Michael sure does pull down plenty of tail - Jan, the girl who moved to New Hampshire, Pam's mom, the woman he proposed to at Casino Night after three dates, this new bartender...

In other business around the office, Dwight at first tried to get Kelly into the minority training program, believing that he would be able to use her for his own benefit, as opposed to Daryl. However, Dwight changes his mind when he realizes that Ryan has more pull with her, and he then tries to get a Japanese janitor to apply instead. Kelly gets the appointment instead though, and honestly, this isn't Dwight's best work. This whole subplot is much better than all of Michael's awkward flirting with the bartender, but it is the B-plot of the episode for a reason.

Grade: D+

TV Review: Hey, The Office didn't suck this week!

Is it sad that I'm now surprised when The Office doesn't disappoint me? While it was still far behind Community this week in terms of quality, at least in this humble reviewer's opinion, the main plot angle exploring Erin and Andy's relationship was pretty humorous.

I think all of us know a girl like Erin - She's pretty and cute, and you wonder, "Hey, why doesn't she have a boyfriend?" Then you start to peel the onion like Michael Scott did, and you realize that she is completely, utterly effing nuts.

The highlight of the episode occurred in the restaurant, as Michael was quizzed my Erin about a bunch of random crap. In typical Michael Scott fashion though, he let it slip that Andy was once engaged to Angela, which makes Erin have a freaky panic attack, burying her face in her hair. "In the foster home my hair was my room."

The minor plot of the episode involved harassment around the workplace. Specifically, Kevin talks like Cookie Monster from Sesame Street. Or, as Dwight would say, "Is that the program where all the puppets live in a barrio?" However, the plot got less interesting as Toby's replacement in human resources tried to suspend Pam and Jim.

There were actually a ton of great lines in this episode. "If it wasn't for secretaries I wouldn't have a stepmom." "I knew it existed and I chose to let it die." "She's kind of a rube." "They're making fun of Cookie Monster, but in a strange way, it's like they're making fun of me." "How many pillows do you sleep on at night?" "I don't think he's the best dresser - he reminds me of Easter." "Of course, I'll get you a bowl of pickles."

With the Erin drama and all of the great lines though, this was probably my favorite episode of The Office this season. They need more shows like this, focusing on some of the secondary characters, as opposed to always making it about Michael Scott and the drama of the Saber / Dundler-Mifflin corporate hierarchy.

Grade: A-