Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Steveats: The Oddly Disappointing Angriest Whopper

Debuting a new, semi-regular feature! I tryout questionable food items so that you don’t have to in… Steveats. (Note: Title developed in about 10 seconds of brainstorming.)

For the second time, I’m going to the Burger King well for a Steveats. And for the second time, I’m disappointed! Although this time, it’s for oddly disappointing reasons.

Frankly, the Angriest Whopper is not really that angry. The main gimmick is the bright red bun, which allegedly has hot sauce baked into it. However, it just tasted like a normal bun to me, and I’m someone who’s usually pretty damn sensitive to any sort of heat. Like, a jalapeno ring or two is normally plenty for me on some nachos or a burger. I’m not sure if the taste varies from bun-to-bun (teehee), but my particular Angriest Whopper was incredibly tame.

The other ingredients, according to the BK website, are jalapenos, thick-cut bacon, “angry onion petals” and the usual lettuce, tomato and mayo. The bacon was OK, but it tasted like the normal BK / fast food microwaved bacon to me, not any sort of special thick-cut variety. Likewise, the angry onion petals were seemingly just partial or smaller onion rings. They either had no or a weak hot sauce on them. My particular Whopper only had a couple jalapenos on it, and they were the hottest component by far. Still though, they’d probably disappoint anyone serious about setting their taste buds aflame. I didn’t really consciously want this, but if something is being billed as The Angriest Whopper, then I do kind of want it to be something that I regret eating for that reason, not just because it’s gross.

The worst part though? I paid about $5.50 for the “pleasure” of the Angriest Whopper. That’s about $2 more than a normal Whopper, even though the main differences seemed to be 1) the tasteless bun 2) a few strips of bacon and 3) jalapenos. To double down on the bad news, BK’s website said it’s 830 calories for the damn thing! And 1,530 mg of salt, more than half the recommended daily allowance. Blah. Anyway, this is a fast food item that y’all can safely skip. The best part is the design on the wrapper.

(Side TMI / gross note: At least this Whopper doesn’t have the poop problem the Halloween Whopper did, at least in my field research…)

If you have a request for a future Steveats, leave it in the comments on here or on my Facebook. To check out some of the past Steveats, go here!

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