Showing posts with label Emma Stone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Emma Stone. Show all posts

Monday, June 3, 2013

Inexplicable Video Game Review: Asian GTA (and Emma Stone)



The easiest way to describe Sleeping Dogs is via the title I used for this entry. Basically, the game boils down to an Asian version of Grand Theft Auto – it’s a big sandbox crime game set in Hong Kong, and takes two steps forward but one step backward with its portrayal of morality. It seemingly offers you a bit wider of a path to take at first before you realize, nah, this is just as violent and immoral as Grand Theft Auto, even if you are playing a cop.

The premise – You’re Wei Shen, a cop on loan from the San Francisco PD to a department in Hong Kong, where you grew up. Because of your background and because you grew up with the lieutenants of the gang triads, you’re tabbed for undercover duty.

As opposed to pretty much every other undercover situation ever though, the department doesn’t seem to mind you regularly executing gang members. Or running over pedestrians on the street – If you do happen to get caught by the police afterward, well, it’s just a $15,000 fine / bribe to get out of the clink.

Since the game can be tricky in spots, I did get caught by the police a couple times, and each time that struck me as ludicrous. Why not have your character just respawn from a checkpoint instead? That’s what happens when you’re actually doing a mission for the triad or the police force.

Beyond that, if you want to platinum the game, it requires that you do some really morally squeamish things for completely unknown reasons. One of the stat awards requires that you kill 50 cops, even though it’s technically possible to play through the main storyline without intentionally killing police officers. Another stat award requires 50 destroyed vehicles, so the easiest way to do that is to ram civilian cars on the highway – there actually aren’t that many missions with the triads where you can destroy their cars repeatedly.

These elements detract a bit from a really solid narrative – the game was published by Square-Enix, and shares some plot elements with their better games – and some good innovations when it comes to the sandbox genre. As opposed to, say, Infamous, anything that you can collect – health upgrades, melee upgrade statues – is shown on the mini-map and can be manually selected on the map. Then, depending on the location, you get turn-by-turn directions presented on the screen. (It’s nice when a game set in the present somewhat acknowledges the idea of GPS.)

So, overall, getting back to the actual game… If you can get past the moral hurdles I outlined a bit, then Sleeping Dogs is worth its purchase price, which is about $10 to $25 on eBay, depending on whether you want it new or used. It’s also currently free for Playstation Plus subscribers.

(I’ve inadvertently been shilling for them the past couple of blog entries, but it’s mostly because I got rid of my cable to save money. My GameFly and PS+ membership combined is barely a quarter of the cost of what my cable TV cost.)

Random note: Sleeping Dogs keeps up the trend of Emma Stone playing non-redheads for some inexplicable reason. Even in digital form, she shows up as a blonde. Dear Emma, since I know you’re no doubt reading this, please stick to the red hair. Even if it’s not your natural hair color, I guarantee you, it’s a good look on you.

The picture of Emma Stone is a fairly common wallpaper from the Internet, which I found via Google Images. And if she needs more proof to go back to red, about 90 percent of the results for “Emma Stone hot” are with her as a ginger.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

A ho-hum Saturday Night Live with the gorgeous Emma Stone

I didn't realize that Emma Stone was so tall, and had such great legs, until last night's Saturday Night Live. Also, there was a pretty funny sexual education skit in the final 30 minutes - It was much, much better than the lame ones with Kenan Thompson.

And hey, now that I think about it, there were several good moments in Weekend Update. It's silly, but I like the Stefon character. Furkels was great, and made me spit-take a bit. And Kenan was really good as that wacky "The rent is too damn high!" character. And the weird French dancing skit was something they would have done on an old school Saturday Night Live, and very effective.

As usual, anything Kristen Wiig was in made me recoil. And the opening monologue? I bet while Jay Pharoah was watching in the background, he was thinking, "Why does this Fred mother effer get to Obama?" That was long, drawn-out and not funny. Same thing goes with everything Wiig was featured prominently in. Another funny skit, the "my brother is awesome!" show, made that clear to me. Just start putting the new girls in every skit, Lorne Michaels.


Note: Sorry for the brevity of this entry, but I'm doing this, that and the other thing tonight - Packing for a two-day trip to New York, preparing for the initial high school newspaper edition of the year, planning for my site launch on November 1... Being an adult is tough work.

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